Sunday, May 6, 2018

I Just Want to Be Happy


Saturday afternoon, I officiated Jamie and Ty’s wedding ceremony, at Cascade Village, in Durango, Colorado. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

“Where should we get married,” is one of the first questions a couple might ask, following their engagement. Knowing Jamie and Ty, this question was probably addressed while drinking a green liquid, wearing skis, or both. To some couples it’s pretty simple; they get married in their hometown, and if they are from different locales, the bride’s hometown. So, we could have ended up, please contain your excitement, in a little town called Seminole. Others choose to have a destination wedding, which means going somewhere beautiful and fun, to which the couple have no real connection. I’ve not run any data analysis on this, but those two options probably cover most couples. 


So, I am always intrigued when a couple chooses a third option, a place that is meaningful to them, personally. That is the choice that Jamie and Ty made. Neither one of them is from Durango, and though beautiful to visit and fun to hang out in, Durango to them is much more than just a destination. It is central to their relationship. 

Listen to Ty, and you can really hear his calming voice come through even in the written word, when he writes about himself in the third person: “Durango is... home...  There is no place one (would) rather be. Life changed on April 7, 2015.  In... (a) health food store, Jamie... arrived looking for a green drink; they were popular that day... As a gentleman, Ty helped Jamie with her groceries to her car and received her digits. Jamie was bound for Texas and who knew if she would ever be seen again. Kept in contact here and there. Couple weeks down,  Jamie decided to come back to town. Luck was on Ty's side. First date was a hit. Found out both were Aquarius; great sign. Had a magical weekend to (form) a great bond.” 

Jamie agrees, when she says, “I think it was love at first sight for me. I came back to see him a few times and we spent some time together and really had a deep connection.” Durango was part of the reason for that. In fact, when I told her how impressed I was by her résumé, and I asked if should ever get back into banking, she said no, because living in Durango was more important. 

Now, you might be asking yourself, where is the lesson here? Well, we just passed that, but let me spell it out through a story, which Goldie Hawn told about her childhood: “Happiness was always important to me. Even at the young age of eleven, it was my biggest ambition. People would ask, ‘Goldie, what do you want to be when you grow up?’ ‘Happy,’ I would reply, looking in their eyes. ‘No, no,’ they’d laugh. ‘That’s really sweet, but I mean . . . what do you want to be? A ballerina? An actress maybe?’ (I would insist) ‘I just want to be happy.’” Guess what Jamie says about her mom, who is here with us in spirit? She channels Goldie, when she says so simply, “When I would ask my mom what she wanted me to be when I grew up, she would say she just wanted me to be happy, and Ty makes me very happy.” 

This should not surprise you. After all, that profound message and cool vibe, so beautifully expressed by an eleven year old Goldie Hawn, is “so” Jamie and Ty, and also “so” Durango. Don’t take my word for it; just walk down the street. Need further proof? Where did they film the ultimate movie about the power of a place to reshape your life, put things in perspective, and enhance your happiness, City Slickers? That’s right, Durango, Colorado. 

Ty says that Jamie, whom he would have never have met if not for Durango, is “the love of my life I have patiently been waiting for.” In this it is Ty who channels a scene at the end of that legendary film, not far from Ty’s hometown. One of the heroes of the movie, Mitch, has returned from Durango, his family has picked him up at the airport, and he is hugging his children as his wife, Barbara, walks up. He points towards his broad smile and says, “Hey, look what I found.” She responds “Ooh, that looks nice. Where did you find that?” And Mitch, feigning exasperation, says, “Colorado! Isn't it always in the last place you look?”

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